Los Angeles, CA – Bernie Sanders continues to cement himself as the Mr. Magoo of the 2016 Presidential Run. Earlier this week, while doing some pre-Black Friday Christmas shopping, Bernie Sanders forgot where he parked his car. The Presidential hopeful spent over an hour looking for his 2003 Pontiac Aztek before finally a kind young man offered him some assistance.
“I just saw this guy wandering around looking kinda lost,” said the man who helped Sanders and would only identify himself as Mike. “To be honest, I didn’t even recognize who he was at first. He just kinda looked like somebody’s crazy uncle, ya know?” Sanders was very appreciative of the help offered by the young man.
“This guy is a shining example of the kindness you see in today’s youth culture,” said Sanders. “We need more young men and women out there like Mike who are willing to go out of their way to help others.”
This story would be touching enough if Mike had simply helped Sanders and then the two had went their separate ways, but they actually ended up spending the rest of the day together. Sanders and Mike walked all around the strip mall eventually finishing up Sanders’ Christmas shopping.
“It was a lot of fun meeting Bernie Sanders,” said Mike. “He’s a pretty cool guy. Dude bought me a pretzel.”
Samuel Ferren, a representative from the Senior Citizen’s Advocacy group told us about the realities of elderly individuals losing their vehicles. “It can be really dangerous for senior citizens out there especially when they lose their cars.” said Ferren. “Over two dozen senior citizens die of exposure every year when they are unable to find their vehicles in parking lots. American parking lots are literally running red with the blood of the elderly.”
Currently, 42% of Democrats support Bernie Sanders for his Presidential bid, according to the latest poll results from Iowa. He is still trailing behind Democrat front runner Hilary Clinton who currently holds an impressive 52% of Democrat support. It is unclear how long Clinton can maintain her support in the face of the current FBI probe investigating her email account. According to a Public Information Officer from the FBI, Clinton’s email could have been compromised when she clicked on a series of spam emails advertising mail order pastry chefs.