Washington, DC — After the 5-4 decision by the Supreme Court on Friday, ruling that the Constitution guarantees a right to same-sex marriage, US Senator Rick Santorum and the Former Governor of Arkansas, Mike Huckabee, have vowed to move into a quint cottage on Nantucket Island if the judgement does not get overturned.
“This decision by the Supreme Court defies God and the Bible,” Santorum told CNN. “What Mike Huckabee and myself plan to do will really ruffle up some feathers in Washington until this wrong is made right.”
Santorum’s wife told Fox & Friends that the family is sad to see the two leave, but she believes it is best for the country.
“I’m so sad to see my husband leave, but at the same time I know what him and Mike Huckabee are doing is the best thing in the interest of the American people. Plus that cottage of theirs is just so cute and they are always spending so much time there together, plus going on vacations with each other to Hawaii and other tropical spots. I know they’ll get along just fine. Both those two are just so brave!”
“This cottage is amazing!” Huckabee told Fox News. “It’s right on the beach so me and Ricky can really work on our tan lines. And the locals here are just so gosh darn friendly, and the shopping is to die for!” Huckabee continued, “We are going to show those sillies in Washington that they made a big mistake and if they don’t fix it right now, I am just going to get so super angry! And you don’t want to see me when I’m super angry!”
Paul Horner, who lives in the residence next to the cottage that Santorum and Huckabee will be staying in, told reporters he is not looking forward to it.
“They’re just the worst,” Horner said. “They have these loud parties that go well into the morning, and I have no problem with the amount of men that come and go from their place, but I have children that have school in the morning and the noise is just too much sometimes. I can’t wait until they finally decide to settle down and just get married already.”
